It's nice to be home, though, with the bunnies and my computer and my comfy bed. I am lonely and have been. God, I miss him so much but it's all just so stupid when I really think about it. Were all the orgasms worth it?
Yeah.
Someday soon I'll stop bingeing on sex. Someday soon I will be living with a significant other, being faithful and wife-like. I don't trust myself single and I hope to not be for much longer.
I'm just being honest here.
I think this is all I write about now, and I'm sorry, but the law boy took so much out of me. People always talk about some wall that gets built deep, deep within the human body when you just can't take it anymore. It doesn't let anyone pass, not even the people who deserve to. You'd think I'd have an ancient brick wall. Or at least some sort of tall, sharp fence from all the deaths in my life. I was never dosed with any sort of barricade to keep people out. I always wanted more and more people in my life. I always fell in love so easily and I always made everyone my best friend. But now, shit is just different. I have a wall. It's established; made of concrete. It's stable and it's strong. Well built. It's also very, very new to me.
There are two boys willing to make me theirs for...forever. They are both successful, both good looking, both perfect. But I can't say anything but NO NO NOOOOOOO!
Because either of you have the machinery to break down this wall of mine
:(
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